I got two e-mails in the last two days from women asking me what the best way to meet guys is. Firstly, I have to say, I’m extremely interested to know which part of my blog makes them draw the conclusion that I am some kind of expert in this field. But hey, I’ll give it a shot anyway. I could really elaborate on these three points and go into much more detail, but I won’t. Today.
1. Figure out what you want in a partner and in a relationship
Make a list if you have to. Think about what is important to you in a relationship. Where do you stand when it comes to honesty, affection, generosity etc. Other attributes you may want to consider are: kindness, wealth, understanding, romantic, compassion, trust, honesty, affection, integrity etc.
Also take the time to think about lifestyle aspects that may be important to you. Should he be open to having children in the future? Should he have a stable and regular job, or is it more important to you that he has flexibility in his schedule because you love to travel? Is it okay with you if he is in some debt? Should he be an animal lover?
2. Figure out what you can offer as a girlfriend and within a relationship.
Don’t just focus on “Finding the perfect guy”. That guy is probably looking for “the perfect girl” too, and if you’re not her, he’s going to look right past you. So you have to do your own work too. You have to think about what you have to offer as a woman and in your relationship. Embody the qualities you want to attract. If you want a romantic dude, be a romantic girl. You can’t be unromantic and strict and expect romance from your partner. It isn’t fair and it doesn’t align with the law of attraction. You have to be in alignment with your desire in order for it to manifest. You have to be what you want.
Start getting your life in order. Work on yourself. Learn about yourself. Make space in your life for a partner. Focus all your energy on becoming the kind of girl that your dream dude would actually want to take out to the movies. Focus all your energy on becoming the kind of girl that you want to be.
3. Get interesting.
You know what is sexy? Being interesting. It’s even sexier than hair tosses, fluttering eyelashes and your little back cocktail dress. So how do you “get interesting”? You start to pursue your own interests. Take up a cooking class, a dance class, a bootcamp, a book club, a community. Get out there, woman! Find out what is available in your community and be there.
I am not saying that you are guaranteed to meet your prince charming at a cooking class, but what you are guaranteed is more exposure to like minded individuals sharing common interests and hobbies. This is a great foundation to any rocking relationship. Any relationship built on common passion is certainly not a bad one.
I believe the best couples, at the beginning of their relationship focus on content, connection, common interests, hobbies and activities to engage in together. It’s only later into their relationship journey that they begin to focus on each other as single people, and that is when love, passion, attachment and commitment really begins to develop.
I would be a bit suspicious if it was the other way around. When it is the other way around, it sounds more like infatuation to me.